complacent....

The year of the OX is wading its shadow. Reflecting what I have been and done yesteryear, im quite a better man now.

In the midst of our lives we often look back, trying to live our present life in a best way that we could, but in as much as we wanted all things to be done in accordance with our will, we still sometimes or worst most often fail and dismayed.

Living my life for the past twenty eight years is not that easy but I guess those can be considered as spices to our lives.

Reckoning the grievance of one of my closest friend yesterday extruding an ambiguous notion I was a little bit shocked as it haunts me. What's haunting me?, this you may ask.

It is the mere fact that you can not exist by your own - alone. Even how courageous, sturdy and firm you are you will be still dependent to your family. Yes dependent....your complete happiness still lies within your family.

My friend was my eye opener. I received an SMS from him yesterday telling me that he is very pissed of with his life for even how much he wanted to have something for himself he couldnt afford to have it, becase many times when he tries to please himself its always his family that comes first and he's helpless - a childish attitude, though Im not putting him down but the verge on where he is now is the same where I was, two years ago.

Where I even always question my self, can't I be happy or just be free for even a day? Pitiful as it sounds, but its the reality of life.

That slice of reality always bagged me to these four corners, walled with my endeavor to take a great leap giving me enough adrenaline to withstand everything.

During my early 20's I was like him, very childish. Im only thinking to live by my own but im not happy not until I matured and learned something new day by day.

with sir Mark during GC CCS Week 2009 day 1

CCS faculty and staff

CCS Faculty

Lavhie, Ashe, Beitboi and Chris